Much respect and empathy for your eloquent and astonishingly clear-visioned/reflective post. You seem to be at a point of self-observation and clarity that I am only now beginning to have a grasp of? I am 53, and my evasion of “life’s issues” and such began long, long ago?and I imagined them somewhat “controlled” through diet insanity, orthorexia, and anorexia athleticI am currently searching for a new, improved “team” to aid me in my quest towards self-affrontment and facing life as it is.
I hope to find groups as supportive as your own to be able to ignore current cultural mandates to be “not only?perfectly fit, but also endlessly young, rich and invulnerable”‘so concisely put.
Thank you for this profound sharing of your personal, brave forward movement. I needed this ?and know many will benefit.