I understand completely. I have a strong desire to live a normal life and pretend that I don’t have any health problems. Back when I was younger, I had a ton of fun getting completely drunk with friends and chain smoking cigarettes, but I still felt relatively fine the next day. Can’t do that anymore–but now I feel like shit most mornings regardless of what I do the night before.
For me, alcohol doesn’t seem to have much of an impact of my health, unless I drink to excess. Now I moderate myself (except for the rare get-together with old friends) and that works out pretty well. I wish you the best of luck with what you’re doing. If it’s any consolation, you’ll probably find that the occasional beer is no longer a problem once you can figure out what’s behind your poor health. Unfortunately, it can be really hard to identify some problems and figure out the right solution.