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I am a long time ahead recovering person. The journey is long and hard but the path of health is worth it.
I have come to a cross roads as a I face a long term emotional issue that has had me repeatedly using dieting and “getting fit” to avoid the issues. Dieting and focusing on fitness to an extreme is a convenient way for me to avoid my fears and my life’s issues.
This behavior/ thinking started at 14 years old. And at 49, dieting and losing weight are my brains auto go to when I am stressed.
Without support, I would be dead from the insane drive to hyper focus on my body and food.Today My choice is to go back into diet insanity or use my support system ( therapy groups) to find out what is really going on and make choices for myself that are kind, nurturing and life enhancing. Without my supports I get blinded by the cultural obsession with not only being perfectly fit, but also endlessly young, rich and invulnerable.
Much respect and empathy for your eloquent and astonishingly clear-visioned/reflective post. You seem to be at a point of self-observation and clarity that I am only now beginning to have a grasp of? I am 53, and my evasion of “life’s issues” and such began long, long ago?and I imagined them somewhat “controlled” through diet insanity, orthorexia, and anorexia athleticI am currently searching for a new, improved “team” to aid me in my quest towards self-affrontment and facing life as it is.
I hope to find groups as supportive as your own to be able to ignore current cultural mandates to be “not only?perfectly fit, but also endlessly young, rich and invulnerable”‘so concisely put.
Thank you for this profound sharing of your personal, brave forward movement. I needed this ?and know many will benefit.
You are so welcome.Thank you for your response to my post.
I wish you all the support you need to heal.I really like that you brought this up. I too try to ask myself, what am I really stressed about. All I can come up with is that I am exceedingly bored and understimulated, albeit busy with school and work. hmmmm
Oh yes, school, work and boredom, I know those well!
So if anyone is interested, a great book that helps one get to the bottom of their Ed is called It’s Not About Food by Laurelee Roark and Carol Emery-Normandi.
That said, I cannot imagine doing this recovery without my therapy groups. My Ed/obsession with fitness/health is as strong as the media and diet/health industry intended it to be.
Another amazing book is Health At Every Size by Linda Bacon Phd.
That one had me fuming with anger. We have been duped and our recourse/revenge is to love our bodies EXACTLY as they are. Even if we are fat when all is said and done. Fat and healthy is better than thin and sick. That’s my take anyway.: )
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