I know it’s hard to swallow but I think Matt is 110% correct in his comments. And consider this: If you lose weight for him you risk losing your sex drive again- you will have purposely modified your body for another person’s pleasure, willfully forgoing your own. You are saying that your body is of more importance to another person than yourself. That sounds like an ideal way to sell yourself out and undermine your confidence, which will set you up for a host of other problems. Problems that might even cause you to gain weight.
Marriage itself is not a biologically driven institution. To commit to a person for life means for life, and life is not lived in the body of a 25 year old, pre-children. It is exactly true that if he “signed up” for your younger, leaner body and is now hating your new, older body that produced and feeds his child, than I think he has much to consider about what marriage really is. I know your marriage is important to you, but you have to be important to you too. Good luck and be well.
I wonder if the husband has some form of ED and is projecting his anxieties/obsessions onto Scarlett’s Mom? Does he police his own body as well? If he doesn’t, he’s got a misguided sense of entitlement perhaps bordering on narcissism; if he does, then maybe he needs to eat some more food, as well!
I wonder if he is also having trouble adapting to the idea of fatherhood? Maybe wanting your earlier body is a kind of nostalgia for life pre-baby? But, of course, harping on one’s wife over a pretty insignificant weight gain isn’t the way to deal with it.
Objectively, 137# at your height is not “fat.” Most people would describe that size as “normal.”