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I sometimes like to make up parody ads like the ones I posted for Steven’s Nutritionally Correct News blog.
Why?
I don’t know really. I’m just weird.
Anyway, here’s one I posted on an ex-Jehovah’s Witness site (now defunct) a while back:Guys, have you ever had problems with your…performance?
Many factors can contribute to this, but one of the most common causes is stress. It’s good to do all that you can to minimize the effects of stress in your life, but let’s face it, in today’s world, it is almost impossible to avoid stress. Does that mean that there is no hope of having a great love life?
Not at all!
Your prayers have been answered, thanks to Viagra!
Viagra will pick you up, no matter what!
Take it from one of our satisfied customers, JC:“One time I had the fate of the entire human race on my shoulders. Talk about pressure! Thank God I had Viagra! Viagra lifted my xylon faster than you can say ‘Raise the Lord!’ My girlfriend Mary and I were praising Yahweh all night long. Thanks Viagra!”
No, JC…Thank YOU.
Viagra. It will make a believer out of you. Get some today.I love anachronisms.
Anyway, Thomas, I thought that you and Steven would appreciate this, even if no one else did. You two seem to have similar, off-the-wall senses of humor like me.@ironrod, I am the moderator for two Yahoo Group Amish clubs. Now they’ve been mostly inactive for the past few years (so a lot of spam), but if you go back to the beginning posts and work yourself through them, you might be entertained:
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/amishanonymous/
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/internetamishsociety/Hey Thomas!
I found the perfect woman in the very first post that I read:“Congratulations on the latest barn-raising – it looks just fine here!
My melons are positively ripening at the thought of our new home!I think we should have a sausage eating competition in honour of the
occasion. What do all you brothers and sisters think?:)
Kim…”
@Ironrod, if you read through some of the posts in either of those groups, you will find plenty of funny stuff. In one of the groups, somebody who is related to Amish people threatens to sue me (this wasn’t a joke, even though it was funny. The person was really pissed off about us making fun).
Jezz. Some people have no sense of humor. I just don’t get that.
BTW-Speaking of humor, I enjoyed some of your posts over there.@Ironrod, for a long time I couldn’t believe that there were people without a sense of humor. Believe me, such people exist.
I totally understand people not liking to be the butt of jokes. I grew up in West Virginia and have had to put up with incest jokes all my life. I can still laugh at them though. I tried to make the relative of the Amish person understand that I was just playing around.
By the way @Ironrod, what do you think of the women on this forum. I am very happy every time I see a new photo. Almost all of them are extremely hot.
Sadly, Thomas, you are right. They do indeed exist. The great Dave Barry referred to them as “humor-impaired persons.”
It’s ironic that you mentioned your “incest joke” situation in order to illustrate the difference between you, a person with a sense of humor, versus those folks who are humor impaired and can’t laugh at anything, because I was also going to use a similar, personal example.
I have been overweight my whole life (except for two brief periods wherein I followed extreme diets and managed to get *almost* lean) and was ridiculed for it all through school. As a result, I have almost zero self esteem and an eating disorder. But you know what? If someone tells a fat joke, and it is funny, I am going to laugh. Like you, I am not a humor-impaired person.BTW-It was very kind of you to try to help that humor-impaired person understand that you were just kidding around on the Amish Group forum.
Once again, my friend, I am in complete agreement with you. This forum is indeed populated by a number of excellent examples of my very favorite species, The Goddess.
I, too, enjoy the fact that new pics are popping up regularly.
That said, I must say that I am still anxiously awaiting the day that TheRealAmy will choose to add her own contribution and bless us with a digital representation of her feminine beauty. :)No problem Steven.
We have been doing our best to carry on during your absence.
It’s good to see you back, though.You’re right about that Thomas.
We can’t even buy a visit from TheRealAmy, for instance.
Maybe we should drop the cover charge.
Oh wait…
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